Years ago, a friend gave me a book by a guy named Dan Allender entitled “Leading with A Limp.” It talks at great length about how leadership often puts one in the line of fire in ways to where we come away limping. But it also talks about how God uses those things—our weaknesses … and failures … and shortcomings—in a wonderfully redemptive and restorative way.
The reality of pastoral ministry is that the range of required abilities and skills is so diverse and varied that none of us is going to be strong in every area of desired competence. Each of us is going to bring weaknesses to the table—in fact, if you’ve been in ministry for a number of years, you’re probably keenly aware of where you fall short. You know those areas where your God-given gifts carry you—where you soar and are unusually effective with what often feels like minimal effort. But you also know those areas where you muck along as best you can because there are certain expectations that come with the territory … areas where, no matter how hard you try and how much energy you invest, you will only be minimally effective.
Chances are, as well, that the areas where we’re naturally weak are going to be friction points in our relationship with our congregation. Whether it’s the fact that we’re not the most gripping communicator … or we feel a bit awkward and clumsy in large group settings … or we can’t think of the right thing to say in the heat of the moment and stutter and stammer a bit … or we lack the intuition and insight to be an effective counselor … or we struggle with organization and tracking a myriad of details … or we tense up to where dealing with interpersonal conflict is a struggle for us, the fact is that all of us have areas of weakness. And quite often it is relevant to those areas of weakness where we encounter dissatisfaction, resistance, and even opposition.
But the real question is, “What are you doing with your weaknesses?” Many of us, as I did for a number of years, try to hide and deny them. And what I learned is that this is a fear-based response. I was afraid of what might happen if people discovered I wasn’t strong in every area so, out of fear, I tried to minimize them. It was a liberating day when I realized that my efforts to hide my weaknesses wasn’t working … that after a year or two, those who knew me well had a pretty good grasp on what my strengths and weaknesses were and my efforts to downplay them weren’t fooling anybody.
I’ve learned that a better option, instead of hiding my weaknesses, was to own and acknowledge them. I think this is the point the apostle Paul was getting at when he said in 2 Corinthians 12:9 that he will glory in his weaknesses so that Christ’s power might more fully rest on him.
In that passage, Paul shares about how he was dealing with a debilitating and incapacitating weakness—a limitation that frustrated him greatly, made his life difficult, and perhaps compromised his effectiveness … at the very least, he certainly felt like it did. We don’t know what it was, but it was something that was constantly before him and hindered him. He prayed, and God chose not to remove the infirmity or take it away. It remained in his life, and he was forced to deal with it on a continual basis.
As it relates to you and me, prayer does not always bring about a dramatic and remarkable change. Sometimes the change is not in our circumstances but in us—we become more empathetic … or more fervent in prayer … or manifest a greater level of dependence—because we are dealing with this unwanted issue.
And the takeaway for you and me is that God uses weak people! He doesn’t use us in spite of our weaknesses. Many times, He uses us because of them! But He can’t do what He wants to do in and through us if we’re not prepared to be authentic and honest about them.